Missed Opportunities

So vacation is over and work starts anew this morning.  It was wonderful to be away but I am back with renewed energy and motivation.  As I reflect back on the past week though, there was much to be happy about, but also some moments to learn and grow from.  There was one particular experience that has stuck with me the last few day.  I pray often to have opportunities to serve others, to get outside the selfishness and isolation of addiction and lift someone else.  Unfortunately, I have a tendency to form a picture in my head of what these opportunities will look like, which can lead to missing the chances The Lord does provide.

Wednesday night, we had spent a long hot day at Disneyland with our kids.  We arrived back to the hotel late, worn out and hungry.  We had eaten an early dinner and then expended a great deal more energy walking.  The boys were begging for a snack and my wife and I were hungry as well so I offered to drive off in search of something to tide us over while she got everyone else ready for bed.  My 9 year old tagged along and we were off on our adventure.

I found a Burger King drive thru without too much difficulty and placed our order.  During this process I kept hearing a clicking sound nearby.  It was quite dark though so I was unable to determine where it was coming from.  After retrieving our order I pulled away from the window and headed back to the main road.  Right as I was about to exit the parking lot, I saw a man wave me down.  He had a pair of jumper cables in his hand and was motioning towards a jeep.  I instantly knew that this was the sound of the clicking noise I had heard.  His car wouldn't start and he was in dire need of a jump start.

As soon as I saw him my mind was filled with justifications. It's, late and I am in an unfamiliar environment, I have my 9 year old with me, my tired and worn out family is waiting on this food. So without pausing to consider the situation from the stranded man's point of view, I looked the other way to avoid making eye contact and drove away.

Shortly after this experience, I got lost trying to find our hotel. The Angels baseball game had just gotten over and so traffic was diverted and detoured away from the routes I was familiar with. I activated our navigation system only to have it lead me on a wild goose chase. It took close to 45 minutes to make the short drive back to our hotel. Far longer than it would have taken me to stop and help the man in need.

When I finally got back, I was angry and frustrated. I blamed circumstances, the car navigation, and my family for asking me to leave the hotel in the first place. I was selfish and whiny. I went to bed that night restless and full of guilt. Deep down I knew why the evening had gone so poorly.

In the days since, I have had much opportunity for reflection. I firmly believe that the failed navigation and adventure on the way home was chastisement and karma. What was asked of me was small, but I wasn't willing to make even a minor sacrifice. It would have taken 5 minutes to stop, pop the hood and attach jumper cables. I have no idea the man's situation. Perhaps there was a wife and or children in the car. Perhaps he was far from home and just as uncomfortable to be out late in a strange neighborhood as I was. Ultimately though, I will never know because I wasn't willing to put my own needs aside for 10 minutes.

When I pray, I often get an idea in my head of what the answers will look like. Sometimes my pride gets in the way of what The Lord is trying to do. I am grateful that I was given this opportunity to learn from my mistakes and grow. I hope that next time, I will extend my hand to another child of God who needs my help.